This page was last updated on: June 30, 2012
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We are delighted to announce that we have entered the savings and investments market with a range of attractive financial products we feel sure will suit the needs of a wide spectrum of investors.

As you may know investing into the stock market can be a very frustrating experience as the price of your shares can go up and down all the time & so you never really know how much your investment is worth. This is where the Tower Hill Guaranteed Return Fund (the "Fund") scores over all the other available products on the market !

Unlike most funds that mess about with initial charges that usually range between 1 & 5%, the Tower Hill Guaranteed Return Fund carries a massive 100% initial charge ! Yes that's right 100%. The result of this is that the daily price - which you won't find published in the FT - is always zero. This means that you can say goodbye to all that angst & worry about what the value of your shares might - or might not - be, as with this fund you can sleep safely secure in the knowledge that you know exactly what it is worth !

Better than that, should you choose to cash in any shares you can do so at any time in writing, by post or even by telepathy and at the precise time the value of your shares will be deposited into the bank account of your choice. This is instantaneous ! - no faffing about waiting for cheques to clear, or worrying about Telegraphic Transfer (TT) charges - its there - right away. We even support third party payments unlike all the other financial institutions out there !

You won't even have to worry about reconciling the item on your bank statement as there won't even be an entry to show you that nothing has been sent - we really have thought of everything with this product.

The Tower Hill Guaranteed Return Fund (the "Fund") is available in a number of currencies to suit the needs of both International and the Domestic Investor. A special 'Jersey' share class is available for those investors who feel the cold.

Meet the Fund Managers

The products are managed by a leading firm of investment advisors - Messrs Percy Dave Stan & Ted Incorporated who have been leading the financial markets in a number of areas, and although they can't think what these are at the moment they do assure us that this is the case.

Below you can see them at their regular morning meeting where they meet every day at the crack of half past eleven to discuss market issues, global economic trends and most importantly which one of the Jason Bourne movies they like the best.

As mentioned above, the initial charge is set at 100% of the invested amount and this fee is used to purchase food for the rescued animals at the Sanctuary

Worked Investment Example

Roger, a man of 35 earning £30,000 is saving for a new car which he wants to buy in 3 years time

To meet Roger's needs our financial advisors suggest a lump sum investment of £1000 together with a regular monthly savings amount of £50.

In three years Roger will have invested £2800 and have 2800 shares in the Tower Hill Guaranteed Return Fund (the "Fund"). If Roger chooses to sell now his bank account will receive a boost of nothing at all. However, had Roger not chosen to have invested with us he would have probably spent the money on sweets and a holiday and be overdrawn by about £2000 - so he is £2000 better off than he would have been & can use that £2000 to get a nice second or third hand car.

Meanwhile Roger's investment will have paid for all the hay at the Sanctuary for 10 weeks. It's a win win situation!

As you can see this is a sound product managed by a team of experts & no investment portfolio worth its salt should be without shares in this fund.

The fund is open to any age group and a certificate will be issued for any lump sum investment over £100. Regular monthly savings schemes can be set up for any day of the month and applications for either lump sum investment or regular savings can be applied for by hitting the button below


The initial charge is 100% and the product does not pay commission. An income yield of approximately zero % is expected for the foreseeable future. Shares are offered at 100p or equivalent (depending on currency of the selected share class)

Messrs Percy Dave Stan & Ted Incorporated receive a fee of 0% (negotiated by Percy Bear) and all charges taken from your funds are put towards the feed costs of the rescued animals

Small Print
Here is some small print

*The FSA stands for Food for Sanctuaries Authority

To apply for investment in the Tower Hill Guaranteed Return Fund simply hit the button below & complete the form
Regulated by the FSA*